Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
