sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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