Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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