I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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