Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
