I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
