were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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