Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
