just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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