wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
