I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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