I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
