a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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