fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
