You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
