windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
