try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
