If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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