A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
this just has baby written all over it
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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