South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize