You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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