What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
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