he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
