yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
