burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Never underestimate the power of titties
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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