You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
