Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
