That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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