I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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