happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
