thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Randomize