Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize