I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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