hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
