think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
