There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
