well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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