all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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