This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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