There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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