I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
