Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize