this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
