I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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