I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
me + whiskey = a bad person
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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