a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize