Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
