look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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