so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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