The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize